May 2013
1 tag
rexuality:
the brave little toaster more like this movie is fucked up as shit?????
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callmekitto:
internetfeet:
People mistake ovulation and menstruation to be the same thing when in fact they aren’t
Ovulation is when the eggs are saying “hello friends I am here”
And menstuation is when the eggs are saying “goodbye friends I am gone”
THIS EXPLAINS THE DIFFERENCE 40x BETTER THAN MY ENTIRE SEVENTH GRADE SEX ED CLASS.
twinkyminaj:
i’m respecting your privacy by not talking to you but asserting my authority as your friend by annoying you anyway
4 tags
I’M CRYING MY OOLD CLUB PENGUIN ACCOUNT STILL FUCKIGN WORKS AND MY SECRET AGENT FLIP PHONE GOT FUCKING UPGRADED TO A SMART PHONE THE TIMES HAVE CHANGED
thecapn:
did you know that teachers are instructed to get in between two boys in an altercation and break their eye contact because boys will disengage once the immediate situation is interrupted but they’re instructed to like never ever get in between two girls in a fight because girls wont stop after they lose sight and will actively try to go through whatever’s in between them and teachers...
nowaclubpenguinblog:
im at the pizza parlor and there was a couple sitting at a booth and the girl’s like let’s go to the coffee shop and the guy says “I’ll meet you there” so the girl leaves and then guy IMMEDIATELY WADDLES OVER TO ANOTHER GIRL AND DOES THE HEART EMOTICON IM DYING
THIS SOUNDS REALLY FUCKING WEIRD IF YOU DON’T REALIZE IT’S CLUB PENGUIN
joshsux:
when mcdonalds accidentally gives you an extra chicken nugget
vvenis:
*sticks my hand in your chip bag* can i have one
supermassiveasshole:
when i was like 12 i used to hate one really bitchy and annoying girl from our class so i sent her a text “you will die in 7 days” during a class and she burst into tears and her mum went to police and i was so scared so i flushed my phone down the toilet
insaneclownpopcorn:
“oh shit im gonna draw something REALLY COOL!”
10 minutes later
zomdi:
OKAY SO OUR FRIEND DESSY HAS A BLACKBERRY BUT IT CORRECTS AUTOMATICALLY EVERYTHING SHE SAYS AND ITS HTH E FCUKGIGN BEST THING EVER IM IN RTEARS
mhektath:
montreal pals there’s a boil-water advisory going around for large chunks of the city don’t drink it pls
smilingemoticon:
shiny-ebooks:
I M LAUGhinG SO hARD PLEASE GooGLe “Pregnant Magnezone”
dovne:
2 tags
hababahababa:
silbro:
dO NOT GOOGLE PREGNANT MAGNEZONE . DO NOT GOOGLE Pregnant Magnezone . DO NOT .
paging-doctorfaggot:
I HATE IT WHEN YOU CAN FEEL A PIMPLE FORMING AND YOU CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT
2 tags
yongmuney:
shoutout to anyone that ever invented a thing
lets do a thing. reblog and add your city and...
Shanghai, China
Pisa, Italy
Longkou, China
Brisbane, Australia
University Place, USA
Salamanca, Spain
Cambridge, England
London, England
Siuntio, Finland
Edinburg, USA
Huddersfield, England
Rendsburg, Germany
Cardiff, Wales
Bridgeport,USA
Groningen, The Netherlands
Cody, USA
Antwerp, Belgium
Greenville, USA
Great Falls, USA
Ghent, Belgium
Sarajevo, Bosnia and Herzegovina
St.John's, Canada
Bourgas,Bulgaria
Terneuzen, The Netherlands
Berlin, Germany
Frankfurt/ Main, Germany
Brescia, Italy
Enschede, The Netherlands
Doetinchem, The Netherlands
Florence, Italy
Glasgow, Scotland
San Jose, Costa Rica
Halifax, Canada
Mostar, Bosnia and Herzegovina
Indianapolis, USA
Portland, USA
Official Dress Code For All Females In Public...
smilingemoticon:
all shirts can only have pictures of Michael Jordan in his Space Jam uniform
sleeves must be long enough that people are convinced that you are a ghost
all pants can only have seven pockets. only seven. no more no less
your shoes must have at least one picture of a meme on them
always carry a boombox with you blasting out the Jimmy Neutron theme song repeatedly until you...
